Showers of blessings!!

This is a quiz and trust me its so bleeding easy…and feel free to rate yourself…

1) Out of all the things that you’ve seen falling from the sky,whats that you’d least expect on a fine sunday morning?

a) Meteorites, A rock from Mars or a UFO(for crying out loud!!!)

b) Crow crap (Filie don’t answer that)

c) A rusted-antique-room-heater-about-the size of a washing machine

d) None of the above

2) What is the most innovative way of disposing a rusted-antique-room-heater-about the size of a washing machine.

a) Leave it there to rot for another 100 years until the rust decomposes leaving no trace that it even existed in the first place.

b) Paint it up and donate it to a museum.Tell them Mohammed-Bin-Tughlak,the sultan of 14th century  Delhi,once owned it.You could make some extra dough this way…

c) Take a good look around and just throw it off your roof-top when nobody is watching.

d) Question is irrelevant because room-heaters-about-the-size-of-washing machines don’t exist anymore.

ANSWERS :-1) C               2) C

Hope you were atleast as smart as the nurses who stay upstairs  to pass this test.If no…man!Miles to go before you sleep…Keep trying!!Thera number aayega…

Flash-back :- 29/10/06 10:30 ish The roomies of 18-B were enjoying the peace and tranquility of another lazy sunday morning when the silence was breached by a deafening sound,of what they assumed was just another drunk-post-diwali psyched fanatic,still having a ball,after stumbling over a clearance sale of ridiculously enormous bombs that unfortunately didn’t  get sold the last week..For all those crazy freaks out there..this is what i wanna tell you from the bottom of my heart and also from my bottom..”THAT AIN”T XTREME MAN!! GET A LIFE!!!”

“Shaken” would be an under-statement…and confused to a greater extend 18-B ians who came out to investigate, continue to stare at the Gigantic room heater that just fell from the sky until the nurses themselves decide to appear at the scene of the crime and enlighten the on-lookers with their “gyan” about “the world’s most innovative way to dispose a rusted-antique-room heater-about the size of a washing machine”….

JUST THROW IT OFF YOUR ROOFTOP!!!

ps:-Kids DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME…This stunt was performed by highly trained and qualified nurses who are skilled to render top-class first-aid treatment to victims who survive a rusted-antique-room-heater-about-the size of a washing machine-crash and live another day to tell the story.

I know what you guys are thinking now….pretty,dumb,nurses….isn’t it just the most perfect combination anyone can ever think off?

They are back!

This information that you are about to receive may suprise,startle or maybe even alarm you…but the truth remains…They exist…and they will strike again! It has happened before..It will happen again..It’s only a question of “When?”

 

It was back in the dark ages (of their lives) in a remote and secluded technological village (exact location has not been confirmed yet) somewhere in the 20 km  perimeter of Alan City and the Dark Valley in a southern state of the Indian sub-continent,Tamil Nadu,that a league of extra-ordianary men and women rose to the great resposibility shouldered on them along with the immense super-natural powers of bad humour and gave birth to the ultimate good-humour-fighting machine, what they called- THE VAZHAPINDY Inc.There have been controversial reports of the Vazhapindies being mutants who, as a result of a sudden leap in evolution,were born with latent superhuman abilities which manifested themselves triggered by the bottled-up frustrations reaching the threshold level  under the strict and obsessionally disciplined regime that thrived on the terror they infested in the minds of the villagers.Many ordinary humans (Homo sapiens) harbor  intense fear and intolerance  towards  The Vazhapindies (often referred to as Homo sicko humorous), who are regarded by a number of scientists as the next step in evolution and are thus widely viewed as a threat to human society at large.The tensions between The Vazhapindies and the rest of humanity exacerbated after a highly tormenting video was released by one of the founder-fathers after  years of contemplation-”Should we or shouldn’t we give them a sign?”

The Vazhapindy alliance founded by Pupunnepen Sypyripiapac and Thopomapas Mapathepew grew over the years absorbing like-minded people, and rendering expert-training to protect themselves from the world and to deliver the  World from the evil clutches of the forces of brotherhoods of good humour.The Vazhapindies were meticulously trained to control their powers by the founder-fathers until Pupunnepen Sypyripiapac chose to throw in the towel and since then has been known as “The fallen Vazhapindy”.

There have been Vazhapindy sightings reported at different parts of the country recently which has proved beyond the shadow of doubt there is a highly-organised operation thats underway and the Vazhapindy influence is growing at alarming rates.Intelligence sources have confirmed Vazhapindy presence in Delhi,Chennai,Mumbai,Bangalore and Hyderabad and suspect they are spreading wings in a well-defined pattern,paving its path, preparing for a final battle whose consequences are estimated to be catastrophical.

The Vazhapindy cells  have been spear-headed by young and qualified veterans of the fraternity namely Meperipin Apabrapahapam(The Big gun-Li’l sister), Ropohipit Gepeoporgepe, RepenC Phipilip (The Vazhapindy parallel to the “Sound Guy” in the Xtreme world)  and the latest addition to the team is nobody other than Sopoporapaj Mapathepews who is allegedly a member of a like minded secret society- The Xtremes .

Over-heard at the Vazhapindy dinner table  :-

Sopoporapaj- Hey there is a dead fly in my chicken curry !#$&)@#$%^&*

Meperipin:- Why do you care when there is a dead chicken in it already!!

Sopoporapaj :- I’m not paying for the fly anyway…i didn’t order for it !!

Thopomapas :- Ladies n’ gentlemen The Fly is on the house!! (inside joke-reference with the chennai wing)

BOULEVARD…not of broken dreams ;-)

This is a poem i wrote long time back in college…don’t know whether you can really call it a poem cos it ain’t got any rhyme or meter or any of those poetry rules followed…..Anyway..it was one of those not-so-sunny days when i was pissed for no apparent reason…

There is this dialogue in American History X…in Danny Vinyard’s voice (Edward Furlong)-reading the conclusion to the report he wrote.This comes after he’s shot..I remember the time when i watched the movie…that quote specifically made me feel gud..Crash was another movie that i really liked…

“So I guess this is where I tell you what I learned – my conclusion, right? Well, my conclusion is: Hate is baggage. Life’s too short to be pissed off all the time. It’s just not worth it. Derek says it’s always good to end a paper with a quote. He says someone else has already said it best. So if you can’t top it, steal from them and go out strong. So I picked a guy I thought you’d like.We are not enemies, but friends. We must not be enemies. Though passion may have strained we must not break our bonds of affection. The mystic chords of memory will swell when again touched, as surely they will be by the better angels of our nature“

Yeah and about the poem…i was happily sleeping during the Robotics class and Ma’m wakes me up cos i “JUST SHOULDN’T SLEEP IN CLASS!!@#$%^&*()_@#$%^&*”    she wasn’t teaching…Anyway i decided to scribble something down to keep myself awake…the result:- Boulevard.

BOULEVARD

By : Thomas Mathew

Time and time again vines of solitude

creep in through the thorny lanes of my mind

Deserted dark roads trodden in the past

Just a few distant lights that cast shadows on the wall

In the eerie silence and the cold wind blowing through my hair

all i have to guard is a heart full of unfulfilled aspirations…

an unending sense of pursuit for a finish line that seems so far away

and an unquenchable quest for a reason to live.

Visions,Reminiscence,Deja-vu

Flashes of faces,fields,events,voices

Strangers met on the bridge to nowhere

Acquaintances that seem familiar as from a past life

Spirits with minds that can decipher,hearts that can agonize and be ecstatic,

Senses that can perceive …all in one casing of flesh that conceals the true person inside,

chained down in a deep dungeon….

Complete denial of liberty,imprisoned by the very self,Paranoid but nobody knows

It’s self-penance,self-denial,intentional self-alienation

It’s an unending saga,an untold legend,a symphony that was never performed

An ode that could narrate the biography of a pilgrim in desolation

And will always remain untold until that break of dawn into an era of eternal sunshine

when the spirit will relish the moment of glory and say within…

I’m through…

What goes around sure comes around

All the characters in this story are fictitious…any close resemblence with any personality living or dead is purely coincidential. 

 Every night after work Thopomapas would  have dinner in UP and sleep over in Delhi..He stayed with his friends from work  in a close knit(literally)  happy malayalee colony in Delhi that was  right across the border… Cross the road and you’d be  in another state.

The day Thopomapas and friends moved into the newly rented house was one tedious day b’cos it involved a lot of cleaning and staightening up.

The electrician had come to fix the newly purchased fans.Everything went smooth under the scrutiny and guidance of the “walking,talking (pretty loud too) guide book to any task under the sun” Mr.Apanapandupu.The other inmates lingered around the house wondering what task did the guide book leave out, which they could pretend to be interested in, before the guide book himself would take over sooner or later.

Supurepesh was obviously confused when he asked  ”hey yopogepeshwaparapan,those VIP frenchies u bought today were not for me???”

Yopogepeshwaparapan tactfully avoided the question by pretending to do his daily push-ups..”hey did anyone see where i left my dumbbells?”

Supubrapamapanipiapan ambitious as always  said “I’m gonna buy a cycle rickshaw..we cud save a lot on travel expenses….moreover I’d be proprieter cum driver cum cleaner cum  manager cum travel agent cum finance manager cum what not????Added benefits-no tax,no registation formalities,100% fuel efficient,eco-friendly,traffic friendly,stylish and ethnic…Old is Gold!! yeeha! and the best part is I could be a hero to those late-for-work hitch hikers* everyday….sigh!! “

After fixing the fans and the so-called switch boards, a long piece of hanging wire catches the attention of the skilled electrician…with flawless expertise and intuition that came from years of hard work as the colony’s highly sought-after electrician he suspects that someone in the neighbourhood could be drawing power from our supply..Evidently proud about his latest discovery, Hero cuts the wire and turns to the in-mates to acknowledge the expressions of utmost admiration and awe brought about by his heroic display of courage and  confidence in his job.

Everyone in the room lets out scornful smiles when Thopomapas comments “someone’s gonna miss today’s tv-serials”

With content minds and weary bodies the roomies decide to call it a day.

Scene 2-next day morning.same place.

Supubrapamapanipiapan wakes up to the not-so-soothing tone of Apanapandupu’s alarm clock.He does the Zombie walk to the loo and takes a leak.Turns the tap on and TA DA!! “ayyayo kadavule!! Thanni illeyaaaaa?????????” In sheer disbelief he tries the other taps next to it and the one at the wash basin. “CODE RED !! CODE RED !!”  The rest of the house hold wakes up..hmmm except Supurepesh of course.

“That jackass electrician cut the wire to the water motor!! ” Supubrapamapanipiapan exclaimes  with an emotion pretty incoherent…was it rage?grief?pain?agony? or just the  sense of loss over the 100 bucks we paid the electrician last night…”power theft!!!my ass!! thiruttu payyle!!! “

Eventually four of the machans sought solace with the girls next door who came to the rescue with buckets of water…”I want  my money back” demanded Supubrapamapanipiapan…”I’ll kill that rogue” Yopogepeshwaparapan grunted flexing his rippling muscles.The guide book wasn’t late to come up with his next instruction “I’ll show you what to do…all i need is a tester, a plier and some insulation tape” bubbling with enthusiasm. Thopomapas just drooped his head and mumbled “Me and my big mouth”

After about an hour the group spent, contemplating and finally tackling the crisis situation..Supurepesh wakes up and sleepily turns to the group “Hey macha…wats up?”

*conditions apply-offer open to only the female gender.age specifications : 20-25

SAYONARA chennai…

man!do i miss chennai or wat!?? 3 months…thats pretty long enough to develop “chemistry” with a city..if u ask me…maybe cos it was a period of recovery and rehab for a mind that was tormented by trifles that really didn’t deserve the attention it enjoyed..

its suprising when you look back and realise how different  u’ve been and the transformations u’ve gone thru…how u’ve gradually changed influenced by the people whom u idolise..originality would have a whole new meaning…

some lessons u learn,in the end,makes u realise  u’ve been a jackass..hmmm to think abt it i guess i was quite a gud one too.. hehe.. but then everything comes with price tag right? what was in store in chennai was amazing…far beyond the  best plans i  could’ve made for myself…many a times we miss out on the greater things that are in store cos v cling on the little things that we value the most…but reassuring is the thought that there is Someone who is constantly watching over the bigger picture..

here are a few things that i miss the most

• the balcony overlooking the city skyscrappers and the fishbowl where we grew a money plant…which was the first thing i’d see when i wud wake up and stare at.. my daily  5 minute vacation to places far far away…
• 2 am bread and omlet at IIT chennai…or the cranberry technos at Ascendas…and the subs at pupil
• late night..high speed drives on ECR
• all the “paara paniyal” with roomies…and “vasantha akka” whenever she used to complain about left over food..
• the luxury of tv,fridge,washing machine,pc wid broadband,landline n’ a maid..man!! TA-15 totally rocked…
• walks on the beach in the night that was jus a stone’s throw from our flat
• chilling wid the band from work…all those late nite practises (“late nite practises”?? sounded kinky!)that used to go on till 4 am..staying awake on the lemon tea from the vending machine that tasted like soap water..c’mon it was free!!
• powerhouse…the place to be…the church in the mall..
• the bike rides…which eventually i put a pause to…after my famous swan dive stunt…
• the endless list o beach-side restaurants..MGM was the best of it all..rohit’s b’day was a blast! kabab court wasn’t bad either..
• above all the people who were priceless…fijichan,aju bhai, tobychan, akka, ash, pocha, suja, timmy n’ fly  ,shainochan,aloy,the band, the PH gang, Bhai’s gang,KIT gang …as i was saying…there is a lot that has been rubbed on to me from all these people..saluuuuuute!!
• oops how can i forget…free scooty pep rides..back from training with ash,pocha  n’ shwetha

“never hold regrets that good times are not there to stay..be grateful that gud times have been there and better times are yet to come”

                                                                      ancient egyptian proverb.

ps-actually i made that up 2 mins bak..

making of another amateur blogger

hey people….i never thought i’d start blogging…never thought i’d have the time,the patience and the creativity it takes to make a blogger…anyways…i’ve jus got so much time at my disposal….thanx to the ongoing chaos between my off-shore delivery manager and the resourcing team…I get to use some punjabi kudi’s terminal in the forenoon cos she’s got the afternoon shift..hehe…though i used to keep a journal back in college…to which i owe a lot…cos thats wat kept me sane all through..atleast i thought so…guess its for my friends to say…anyways…if it was not for all that venting out of all that confusion,hate,anger,turmoil and what not…i wud’ve flipped!!guess we’re all teenagers sometime time or the other..rite?so here i am in my office…in  rummy sharma’s cubicle(i wonder who….know it cos of the name plate on the table) …starting my very first blog ever!! let this moment go down in the pages of history now and forever,once and for all,and let all men and women of all ages,nations,castes and creeds  read it and know i finally acknowledged and accepted the fact that i am bored outta my skull  and decided to do something about it…let me at this auspicious occasion enjoy the privilege to salute the people who inspired me to start blogging..the presdigitator,bluesaze,daedalus,tux,soori.. maybe its jus that i was the only EXTREME! guy who wasn’t extreme enuf to start a blog…so he we are!! GO EXTREME!!(hey for those unfortunate  lowly mortals who are still wondering wat EXTREME is…it was a gang o 5 and half  BIG TIME..when i say big time i mean big time..losers  from bak in college…who really thought they were EXTREME…i hope u get the scent of sarcasm in the air.. courtesy-”Harold and Kumar go to white castle” and a few swigs o mountain dew at midnight from the college canteen.)

As of now I don’t know how long this would last cos sooner or later the company might realise that it ain’t that gud to hire systems trainees who do nothing better than eat free food,enjoy the liberty of using anonymous cubicles,use the CUG to talk to friends in offices across the country(neat huh?) ,hang around at the coffee vending machine as if they own the place,use the restrooms so often to make room for the next few cups of coffee,yapp,and finally get back in the evening to relish the luxury of the fully paid guest house..and order for some home delivery junk food….LIFE IS GOOOOOOOD!!guess this might be just the brighter side of being on the bench…guess the monotony gradually creeps in and as in most cases is a killer!!still the brighter side is ….thats wat motivated me most to start this blog…sheesh!lunch time!!gotta get ahead in line…cathya later…